Artifact Motherhood: The Paradoxes of a Pandemia...

To my children,

These are the strangest of times, they feel like a dream to me, sometimes a nightmare, fortunately we are all healthy and safe. To me these days hold so many paradoxes, so many opposing realities, they feel like extreme closeness to you three and to your Dad, and at the same time extreme distance from everyone else we care about… extreme closeness in our common humanity with the rest of the planet living through this surreal time, at the same time as extreme physical distance from friends and neighbours as we say “How are you?” from 2m away, or from across a screen…

I’ve been trying to compile a diary of sorts, it’s a real mixed bag of phone and camera photographs. My only aim was to capture a small piece of beauty each day, that we could be thankful for despite everything going on.

I can’t help but wonder what these days will feel like to you or how you will remember them. Although you more or less understand what’s going on, and you know we are trying our best to help our grandparents, to talk to them often, to help our elderly neighbours, to help drawing pictures for those who are sick, donating food for those who are less fortunate than us, clapping for all the NHS doctors and nurses who are risking their lives to help the sick people….

I think that mostly you will remember this as that time that we spent soooooo much time together as a family, and you have all embraced that with all your hearts! Never have we shared so many meal-times and playtimes, exercise times and quiet times, bath times, nap-times, even FaceTimes…. 

I do wonder sometimes how it has taken all of this to happen, for us to really embrace the value of thoughtful human connection, precisely now that it has been largely taken away from us…. yet another paradox of these times.

Learning to think about others, sending a face mask to Grandma because there are none left in Spain...

My musical one, you are always at the piano, for hours a day…!

My daydreamer, we are grateful for all the stories and magical adventures you create in your head!

And the joy of the house!

Love is to all pile up on the same corner of the sofa to watch a movie…

Artifact motherhood is a collaboration of artists and mothers from around the world. Sharing stories of the joys and struggles of our journey. Our hopes and dreams for our children. With little nuggets of wisdom here and there. These are more than photographs with dates written on the back. These are the artifact we are leaving behind for children and the generations to come. Continuing the blog circle, next up is my wonderful friend Caro.

To learn more about Artifact Motherhood please visit our website.

The Winds of Change

I’ve been feeling the winds of change lately, I can feel the change coming, but I still don’t know in which direction it’s going to take me. I’ve been talking less, I’ve been feeling more, I’ve been photographing less, I’ve been observing more, I’ve been looking outward less, I’ve been looking inwards more.

Lately I’ve been feeling that I can’t truly express our lives and how I feel in just one image, it just doesn’t feel like I can do it the full justice, cover the full spectrum of emotions that way. Perhaps it’s a reflection of my own insides shifting, growing in layers of complexity, criss-crossed feelings and trying to meet so many emotional needs at once. There are so many layers to every moment, so much chaos, so much love bursting through the seams, frustrations and tears counteracted with boundless joy and laughter, the feeling we need to be constantly on the go balanced by the natural slowness of a young family that reminds me to just be, wherever we are, right now. How do you fit that all into one photograph at a time? Where do you even begin?

So for now, I decided to begin where I am at present, with a small slice of the layers that make up our days…. open to wherever these winds of change might take me.

Because you see, dear children, I think it’s important for you to know that nothing is ever as straightforward as it may seem in just one photograph. Even as adults, especially as adults, we don’t have it all figured out. We try, really hard, to be an example to you, but at the same time we’re constantly figuring out our own path, even multiple paths at once! I want you to know that is ok, even more than ok, it’s a good thing, because it means we’re still growing.

C x

Artifact motherhood is a collaboration of artists and mothers from around the world. Sharing stories of the joys and struggles of our journey. Our hopes and dreams for our children. With little nuggets of wisdom here and there. These are more than photographs with dates written on the back. These are the artifact we are leaving behind for children and the generations to come. Continuing the blog circle, next up is my wonderful friend Hollie.

To learn more about Artifact Motherhood please visit our website.

Life with three kids...

I was just thinking a couple of weeks ago how lucky we were that nobody had been sick this winter, everything around baby M’s birth and first few months had run so smoothly…..

Then of course, disaster struck!

In the space of 10 days we’ve had one serious head injury requiring internal and external stitches under general anaesthetic. Our little boy is going to be a true mini Harry Potter now with the glasses, the scar and all…. a confidence building scar as my husband calls it, don’t worry this will only build his confidence in life! I hope so! That was the scariest part of all, then, following those worrying couple of days in hospital little E was hit with the dreaded stomach flu, I also caught it of course after holding her through a night of throwing up, and am currently battling my way through it, whilst breastfeeding.… A is on his way down as I can see he’s not feeling well this afternoon either. We’ve also had a case of worms, and nits in the midst of all this…! Oh, did I also mention I have a really important work deadline coming up next week… yes, it always seems to be the way! When it rains, it pours!

The good thing about being a third time mum is that you take these things in a much more philosophical way than before. At the end of the day they are just superficial ailments, no true harm done, just one of those seasons of life you need to buckle up and get through.

In the cracks of time I’ve been trying to get some photos of my three littles together…. by far the hardest thing to get them all willingly in the frame! But I’m thankful I’ve managed to get a few over the last couple of months.

All in all, we can only count our blessings, it’s such a blessing to have a healthy baby in the house and overall 3 siblings! I leave you with a little blessing that has stuck with me since baby M was born, he has brought more love and kindness into our home than I thought we ever had space for….

As I enter my new family,

May they be delighted

At how their kindness

Comes into blossom.

Unknown to me and them,

May I be exactly the one

To restore in their forlorn places

New vitality and promise.

May the hearts of others

Hear again the music

In the lost echoes

Of their neglected wonder.

If my destiny is sheltered,

May the grace of this privelege

Reach and bless the other infants

Who are destined for torn places.

{…}

~ John O’Donohue

Artifact motherhood is a collaboration of artists and mothers from around the world. Sharing stories of the joys and struggles of our journey. Our hopes and dreams for our children. With little nuggets of wisdom here and there. These are more than photographs with dates written on the back. These are the artifact we are leaving behind for children and the generations to come. Continuing the blog circle, next up is my wonderful friend Abigail.

To learn more about Artifact Motherhood please visit our website.